In last week’s post, “What Needs to End So You Can Thrive?”, I shared the insight gained from Henry Cloud’s book, Necessary Endings, that in order to move forward, we must first have a vision of what the future looks like and then prune away things that don’t fit.
“When you prune a plant, it’s a process of proactive endings. It turns out that a plant cannot reach its full potential without a very systemic process of pruning.” He contends that there are three types of pruning one must do in order to reach the vision you have in your mind.
This week I am focusing on the first one, pruning healthy buds or branches that aren’t the best ones. When a gardener prunes a rosebush, he knows the plant produces more buds than can be sustained. The plant can only sustain and nurture so many buds to their full potential; it can’t bring all of them to full bloom.
Therefore, a good gardener evaluates every bud for its potential and chooses the best ones to nurture to maturity. The plant has limited fuel and support, so resources are channeled only to those buds that have the most promise.
Just as a gardener needs to evaluate every bud for its potential and chooses only the best ones to nurture to maturity, we must each evaluate the relationships, activities and obligations in our life to determine which need to be pruned so we can thrive.
There are many good things in our lives that we may enjoy or may bring pleasure to ourselves or those we love. However, one person can only nurture so many buds, so many opportunities, friendships and obligations. In order to thrive, something has to go.
If we choose to reach for our best future, the vision of the best we can be, we must prune away those things, activities and yes, people that take away from our ability to focus on where we really need to invest our attention and energy. We forego the good in order to focus on the best. That’s not an easy step to take.
Someone may be disappointed that you have to say no to them. Their feelings may be hurt because you don’t have time for lunch like you used to.
Please note it is not necessary to be mean or difficult as you prune. But in order to be the best you can be, to develop Your Personal Brand, to reach the vision and thrive, you must take the step of pruning away whatever doesn’t fit the vision. That is a necessary ending in order for you to thrive.
Where do you see the good crowding out the best in your life? What small step can you take to prune away the good and make room for the best?